By Phil Walsh - Mon Jul 30 22:02:25 2001
David Beckham is set to move to Mandela United FC in a sensational transfer. According to everyone you talk to, David Beckham is wanted by Mandela United FC , who are preparing an offer of £7million. His manager is keen to sell after rumours that the player is seeking a sex change.

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By Phil Walsh - Mon Jul 30 22:04:13 2001
Ronaldo is set to move to Arsenal in a sensational transfer. According to Guerin Sportivo, Ronaldo is wanted by Arsenal for a world-record £70million fee. However, his new club could be less sympathetic about his lack of personal hygiene.

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By Phil Walsh - Mon Jul 30 22:05:03 2001
Louis Figo is set to move to Juventus in a sensational transfer. According to The Mirror, Louis Figo is poised for a shock switch to Juventus for a fee of £500,000. Unfortunately, it is believed that the player is considering a career in gardening instead.

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By Phil Walsh - Mon Jul 30 22:07:52 2001
Thierry Henry is set to move to AC Milan in a sensational transfer. According to my mate, Thierry Henry wants to join AC Milan in exchange for some nuddy pictures of Debbie McGee.The star's extensive DIY plans look to be the only stumbling block.

....and you heard it first on soccergaming forums.....ah :D

incredibly,this one was a ''world exclusive'' by the BBC that Frank De Boer is NOT going to Ibrox :confused: :confused: :eek: :eek:

man that came as such a shock to me!!!!!!

Originally posted by PhiLLer:
<STRONG>
By Phil Walsh - Mon Jul 30 22:04:13 2001
Ronaldo is set to move to Arsenal in a sensational transfer. According to Guerin Sportivo, Ronaldo is wanted by Arsenal for a world-record £70million fee. However, his new club could be less sympathetic about his lack of personal hygiene. </STRONG>

You would think with all that money he would be able to buy some soap and deoderant. :eek: :D

Originally posted by Can't stop the rush...:
<STRONG>

You would think with all that money he would be able to buy some soap and deoderant. :eek: :D</STRONG>

.....and alot of chicken.... :D :p ;) :eek:

and sandwhiches

Michel Owen to what ever town? LOL. I believe you too. Or who knows maybe he wants to put those guys in the main league? Anyways, i would rather belive Di Canio story, then Owen's one, but Michel's is good too. LOL

And a toothbrush to clean his out-of-shape teeth :D :D :D

Hot news : West Ham striker Paulo Di Canio sensationally joined Aston Villa yesterday after publicly declaring "I couldn't stand playing in claret and blue!"

(This is of course a joke, however my next item that Michael Owen has offered Liverpool £30 million to release him to Aldershot Town is entirely serious!)

Mike.

i believe you with the micheal owen thing

Aldershot Town are my local club, they're in the Ryman Premier League (One down from the Nationwide conference.) They used to play in the old 4th division but in 1991 they went bust and a new team formed in 92. Teddy Sheringham loaned by Millwall 1984, Steve Claridge and Neil Webb have all played for them.

Mike.