JOKES!! Post them here!

[b-ytter]

The teacher was telling her students in the sex education class about human anatomy. She took her pointer and pointed to the picture of the female and said, "the female has two breasts and one vagina."

She then pointed to the male picture and said, "The male has one penis."

Little Johnny jumped up from his seat and said, "That's wrong teacher."

"Why do you think I'm wrong, Little Johnny?" begged the teacher.

My daddy has two of them," explained Little Johnny. "One that's about three inches long that he pees with, and another one that's about eight inches long that he brushes the babysitter's teeth with!"

 

[b-ytter]

A blind man was traveling in his private jet when he detected something was wrong. He made his way to the cockpit and got no response from his pilot.

The blind guy then found the radio and started calling the tower. "Help! Help!"

The tower came back and asked, "What's the problem?"

The blind guy yelled, "Help me! I'm blind... the pilot is dead, and we're flying upside down!"

The tower comes back and asked, "How do you know you're upside down?"

"Because the **** is running down my back!"

 

[Daz]

i walked into a bar.... ouch


a blonde and a brunette walked into a bar - the blonde asked for a gin and tonic whilst the brunette was lying on the floor unconscious

 

[b-ytter]

 

[b-ytter]

 

[b-ytter]

Whats another name for a push-up bra?
False advertisement.

 

[yoyo913]

wow we never had a jokes thread before, good idea

 

[yoyo913]

wow we never had a jokes thread before, good idea

 

[Spurs4Life]

A son asks his dad:

" What does a Vagina look like before sex?"

He replies:

"A pink rose with lovely soft petals and a perfume aroma"

Son then asks:

"After sex?"

Dad replies:

"Ever seen a bulldog eat Mayonnaise?.

 

[Rochester Rhino]

if you want to hear a lot of jokes listen to dave chapelle's stand up called killing them softly.

 

[Davilton]

There you go...

http://www.jokes.com/

'Cut 'n' paste' the best jokes for us, in this thread please.

 

[modena_10]

Originally posted by Rochester Rhino
if you want to hear a lot of jokes listen to dave chapelle's stand up called killing them softly.

hahaha so true rochester, one of the funniest stand up comedy acts ive ever watched

joke: why did michael Carlos*son have to go to the hospital?









he ate a 12 year old weiner

 

[santino]

dave chapelle is the MAN


im rick james bitch!!!!

 

[Help?]

what do you call a cheese that is not yours?










































Nacho cheese!

 

[Bosnian]

Some classic "Yo Mama" jokes

Yo momma so fat, she got more "Chins" than a Hong Kong Phonebook

Yo Momma so dumb she failed a pregnancy test

Yo Momma's armpits are so hairy, it looks like she's got Don King in a headlock...

 

[modena_10]

yo mamma so fat she had to iron her pants on the drive way

 

[b-ytter]

Good jokes! keep posting them!

 

[Rob]

I have a few.

SB9Dragon
Yossarian
Seb
Andrew
Moron
Inter Milan

Thankyou

 

[b-ytter]

Yo mama's football knowledge

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought a quarter back was a refund.

 

[b-ytter]

here is a good one
Little Johnny and his grandfather have gone fishing. After a while grandpa gets thirsty and opens up his cooler for some beer. Little Johnny asks, "Grandpa can I have some beer too?"
"Can you stick your penis in your asshole?" grandpa asked back.

"No"

"Well, than your not big enough"

Granpa then takes out a cigarette and lights up. Little Johnny sees this and asks for a cigarette.

"Can you stick your penis in your asshole?" grandpa asked again.

"No"

"Well, than your not big enough"

Little Johnny gets upset and pulls out some cookies. His grandfather says, "Hey, those cookies look good, can I have some?"

Little Johnny asks, "Can you stick your penis in your asshole?"

Grandpa looks at Johnny and senses his trick so he says, "Well of course I can, I'm big enough."

Little Johnny then says, "Well, then go **** yourself, these are my cookies"