The Dating/Courtship Thread

ShiftyPowers

Make America Great Again
Juventino;3402482 said:
Yeah, that was an impulsive mistake in the moment. I responded immediately by saying ''Yeah, all right, friday is fine'', then added the ''PS. I skipped Juve'' jokingly. She was laughing, but yeah, it was awkward and it came off like I wanted to make her feel guilty ''jokingly''.

Yes, it makes you sound bitter, but it also says "I like you more than you like me" which isn't good either. Why can't you go to the game with her? That sounds like it would be her ideal date.
 

Juventino

Manager
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Yeah, well, can't turn that back now. I won't mention it again. I assume she already made plans to watch the game. She's usually with the same group of friends when watching games or when she's going to the stadium. I'm not sure she's even going to the stadium, I don't think so. She actually doesn't mention Ajax a lot when she's with me, mostly she's taking about movies and books and she wants to go to ballet or theatre.

I did take her to AS Roma - Sampdoria in September. I met her on a university trip in Rome.
 

Juventino

Manager
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Haha, she just texted me that she wants to see me anyway: ''I'll skip Ajax for you''. I offered to buy tickets to the game, so we'll see.
 

Dytza

Banned - Playing with Fire
Your story sounds like a parallel universe for me.

My gf explodes everytime I say a word about football.
 

Chuckínho

Senior Squad
If people were the same as their partner, it would make for a very boring experience. Many couples (Yes I am married), work around this by not necessarily embracing the others interests, but tolerating them. If you want to go and watch a football match, go and do it with your friends and leave your missus to her own vices - My wife is a bit crafty and does lots of sewing and other stuff which I have no interest in, but she tolerates my many whims. If such tolerance exists and you don't keep a ledger then all should go fine. I've spent times awat form my wife for extended periods due to work, but she understands and uses the time to pursue her own interests. I know when you are dating that is can be a bit like walking on egg shells, but if a relationship is based a such fragility, it may not be robust enough to flourish/survive. Just my two pence.
 

fender

Fan Favourite
A girl who is seriously into her football sounds like a keeper. Hey if Ajax don't score you can do the scoring. :jap:
 

Mus

Fan Favourite
I watch you get dressed from in the bushes,
the hot blood to my penis rushes,
and in my heart a lustful fury,
to hold you down and fuck that pussy.
With my cock, of purest desire
I want to set your corpse on fire
and eat it with some lima beans,
Can I come round Tuesday, please?
 

Zlatan

Fan Favourite
Well you do need some common ground when it comes to interests IMO. Otherwise conversations get a little bit awkward after a while.
 

ShiftyPowers

Make America Great Again
Ehhh, isn't it all jokes and "what did you do today" after awhile? Shared relationship goals and sense of humor are more important than interests IMO.
 

Alex

sKIp_E
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Super Moderator
fender;3402775 said:
A girl who is seriously into her football sounds like a keeper. Hey if Ajax don't score you can do the scoring. :jap:

Really? I love going to the football with my mates. It's some "boys time". In a healthy relationship people shouldn't spend every living second together, and should have done interests outside of the relationship.

I don't imagine having a gf who loves football would be great. I'm lucky, my gf likes sport, but doesn't love it. So she doesn't mind when I go to watch a game etc, but doesn't usually come. Occasionally she will come with me though.
 

Zlatan

Fan Favourite
ShiftyPowers;3402864 said:
Ehhh, isn't it all jokes and "what did you do today" after awhile? Shared relationship goals and sense of humor are more important than interests IMO.

Well I don't know but just jokes and things you did today seem very superficial conversation topics for a romantic relationship. That's what you do when you talk to some vague friends, not your partner who you see everyday as far as I'm concerned.
 

Alex

sKIp_E
Staff member
Administrator
Super Moderator
ShiftyPowers;3402864 said:
Ehhh, isn't it all jokes and "what did you do today" after awhile? Shared relationship goals and sense of humor are more important than interests IMO.

Don't know about the first sentence (it can get a bit that way, but knowing, understanding and caring what's going on in your partners life is crucial once you've been in a relationship a while), but the second sentence is spot on. It's much more important to be expecting the same thing from the relationship, and to simply "get along" (sense of humour etc), than it is to share a whole bunch of interests.

I really think it'd be unhealthy to have too many common interests. Regardless of who you are, for a relationship to last you do need some time to do your own things. I'm with Chuckinho here.

Though where Chuck is slightly off I think is the relevance to Juve. When first trying to pickup, the asking to the football etc (if it's something she likes) is a good idea. The issue would be further down the line though, which I guess Chuck is referring to, but I think everyone over promises in a sense at the start of a relationship. That's why the "honeymoon period" exists.
 

ShiftyPowers

Make America Great Again
When I first start dating a girl I will play up the smallest of similarities between us to build some kind of rapport. I've said "you're like the female version of me" a lot of times; at first genuinely, but now not always.
 

Alex

sKIp_E
Staff member
Administrator
Super Moderator
ShiftyPowers;3403035 said:
When I first start dating a girl I will play up the smallest of similarities between us to build some kind of rapport. I've said "you're like the female version of me" a lot of times; at first genuinely, but now not always.

Yeah, when I say that stuff it's more to do with personality traits, likes/dislikes, sense of humour than real interests. But I definitely agree with what you're saying.
 

ShiftyPowers

Make America Great Again
Yes, but any small similarity seems big at first because you just don't know that much about the other person. I've said it and been firmly convinced that I met my female doppleganger only to find out months later that I was wildly wrong.
 


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