I am the master of wasps..... raaagh!!!

[champdave]

A serviette is a towel in French

 

[:: JJ ::]

I don't mind bees, but wasps are right bastards...

A couple of years ago I was having a problem in the house because I kept finding dead or dosile wasps on the floor, window sill, coffee table, even found a dead one on top of my computer monitor. It had me puzzled for days as to where they were coming from, considering that it was autumn time and wasps weren't usually around. One day whilst waking up (and I remember it well, it was the morning after we beat Italy 2-1 in the Euro 2004 qualifiers), I felt a pain in the ankle but thought nothing of it, but when it began to sting I got out of bed and found a wasp crawling along... not surprisingly I got a rolled-up newspaper and killed it instantly..

I thought it was something to do with a gap in the airing cupboard where the boiler is, cos that runs up to the attic, and having had the door and window closed, I thought that there was a nest up there. Anyway, when I went out that day I saw a swarm of the bastards flying into in the alcove under the roof ledge. I called out pest control, who told me that there was a nest, and they dealt with it...

But from that day on even the mentioning of wasps makes the hairs on my arms stick up... and what happened today? Whilst driving home from work with the window half open, a fucking wasp flies in!!! Luckily I was near traffic lights when it occured, so I whacked it with a rolled-up newspaper...

 

[Payaah]

Hey a minute ago, under [Sir Didier*CFC] name its said white bastard

 

[:: JJ ::]

I saw that too...

 

[Sir Calumn]

Yeah, I asked Dragan to change it to that and he did, but then he changed it back

 

[Payaah]

Eeer... your weird man. Why would want to be called a white bastard?

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by Payaah
Eeer... your weird man. Why would want to be called a white bastard?

Cos I am

 

[hunttherock]

oh well no point arguing with Sir_Didier_Drogba on anything

 

[Can't stop the rush...]

Nah it's fun.

For the record I am 1-0 against him.

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by hunttherock
oh well no point arguing with Sir_Didier_Drogba on anything

Dunno if I should take that as a compliment or a critisism.

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by Can't stop the rush...
Nah it's fun.

For the record I am 1-0 against him.

I was tired, I'll kick your ass next time bitch

 

[Tom]

Re: I am the master of wasps..... raaagh!!!

Originally posted by Sir Didier*CFC
This morning I felt totally f*cked, I had massive stomach cramps etc. Anyway, despite this I decided to have lunch at work today as normal. I was sitting at an outside table with some of the other people I work with, when suddenly a big swam of wasps flew out from under the table. There were four of us there, and all of them got stung three or four times each, but I didnt get a single sting. I couldnt move very fast cos I was feeling so f*cked, so they all got away much quicker than me, and two of the little bastards flew up my sleeve, but still they didnt sting me! At this point I just said f*ck it and tried to kill them, there werent actually very many, and it was only at this point that I got stung, after swatting one into my arm with a serviette. And here's the amazing part, as soon as I felt the sting, I felt fine everywhere else. The sting actually cured my stomach problem. Hence, I proclaim myself The Master of Wasps.

i cant explain how much of an extreme phobia of wasps i have.

I was once in a car with my mates, i was sat in the back seat with no way of getting out when a wasp came inside, utterly like a girl (i was 17) i screamed and started shouting, "LETTTTTT MMMMMEEEEEEEEEE OUTTTTTTTTTTTTT" at the top of my voice, in the end my mate lent back and punched it, killing it, lol.

I went outside and had a panic attack llmao, actually wasnt that funny i ended up in hospital

TROD.

 

[Sir Calumn]

Re: Re: I am the master of wasps..... raaagh!!!

Originally posted by TROD
i cant explain how much of an extreme phobia of wasps i have.

I was once in a car with my mates, i was sat in the back seat with no way of getting out when a wasp came inside, utterly like a girl (i was 17) i screamed and started shouting, "LETTTTTT MMMMMEEEEEEEEEE OUTTTTTTTTTTTTT" at the top of my voice, in the end my mate lent back and punched it, killing it, lol.

I went outside and had a panic attack llmao, actually wasnt that funny i ended up in hospital

TROD.

Dont worry, I'll tell them not to annoy you anymore.

 

[Dan the monkey]

Sir_Didier_Drogba your my idol

 

[Tom]

thanks Sir_Didier_Drogba, now whenever i go to places that i know will have wasps i pile my legs and arms full of insect repellent. lol

still doesnt work

TROD.

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by Shifty the monkey
Sir_Didier_Drogba your my idol

Dont worry, lots of people share that view

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by TROD
thanks Sir_Didier_Drogba, now whenever i go to places that i know will have wasps i pile my legs and arms full of insect repellent. lol

still doesnt work

TROD.

Insect repellant just mutates them and turns them into bigger more evil wasps, a big issue seller told me that so it must be true.

 

[:: JJ ::]

You should have asked the Big Issue seller to bet his house on that being true, just for a laugh

 

[Sir Calumn]

Originally posted by :: JJ ::
You should have asked the Big Issue seller to bet his house on that being true, just for a laugh

God I wish I'd thought of that at the time