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lameness - "a stylist noted for the lameness of his plots"
lameness - "a stylist noted for the lameness of his plots"
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Deisler;2779463 said:after being in prison for 15 years, a man escapes. He breaks into a house to look for money & guns but finds a youg couple in bed. He orders the man out of bed and ties him to a chair. He tied the girl to the bed and kisses her neck. Than he gets up& goes in to the bathroom. The husband tells his wife: " Listen, this guy'd a dangerous escaped convict! He probably hasn't seen a woman in years. I saw how he kissed your neck. If he wants to **** you, don't resist, don't complain, do whatever he tells you or he might kill us. Be strong, honey. I love you." The wife responds: "He wasn't kissing my neck. He was whispering in my ear. He told me he was gay, thought you were cute, and asked if we had any vaseline. I told him it was in the bathroom. Be strong, honey. I LOVE YOU TOO.
good oneAlejandrix;2781626 said:WANTED:
A tall well built woman with good
reputation, who can cook frogs
legs, who appreciates a good fuc-
schia garden, classical music and tal-
king without getting too serious.
But please only read lines 1,3,and 5
Sir Sir_Didier_Drogba;2785853 said:What do you say to a man with no arms and no legs when you've forgotten your watch?
Have you got the time on your cock?
Keegan;2765085 said:You can add the names Sly Doverbich and Wilf Huckerwell to the above list.
mrromaniac;2789123 said:An older, white haired man walked into a jewelry store one Friday evening with a beautiful young girl at his side. He told the jeweler he was looking for a special ring for his girlfriend.
The jeweler looked through his stock and brought out a $5,000 ring.
The old man said, "No, I'd like to see something more 'special'."
At that statement, the jeweler went to his special stock and brought another ring over. "Here's a stunning ring at only $40,000," the jeweler said.
The young lady's eyes sparkled and her whole body trembled with excitement. The old man seeing this said, "We'll take it."
The jeweler asked how payment would be made and the old man stated, "By check. I know you need to make sure my check is good, so I'll write it now and you can call the bank Monday to verify the funds and I'll pick the ring up Monday afternoon," he said.
Monday morning, the jeweler phoned the old man. "There's no money in that account," he said.
"I know," said the old man, "But let me tell you about my weekend!"
A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one house it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door.
So he took out a business card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, "Genesis 3:10."
Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock."
Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked."
Keegan;2788990 said:Does he have the diarrhea on the inside or the outside? I don't get it...